Narcissists understand that to gain the attention and admiration they crave, then people must like them. But really they don’t want you spilling the beans. This is presented as a show of solidarity. And may prime their partners not to talk about their relationship to others. Narcissists place great importance on their public facade. Unless they smear you first, and convince everyone you’re the liar. You Tell Others About ThemĪ narcissist may leave you, AND the area they live, if you tell people what they’re REALLY like. Because the narcissist won’t waste their time relegated to equal billing. Because in their mind you’re damaged goods.Īnd with that, they’re gone with the wind. So they may feel it’s better to establish control over someone else. The narcissist may realise it’s impossible to re-establish control over you. Once you’re empowered with knowledge, you naturally fight for equal status. Or perhaps you intuitively know what they’re up to. You may have read up on narcissism and learned their moves. Narcissists may scarper if they know you’ve sussed them. She wanted someone who’d rise to her bait. Which pretty much confirmed my suspicions. She gave her definition of “romantic” as him being jealous when she talked to other guys. When I discovered my ex’s affair, she stated he was more “romantic” than me. If you stop reacting, they lose this control. And they twist the knife, knowing their misdemeanour’s are forgotten. Cleverly changing the subject, making you forget your original point.

Because this allows them to get away with more.įor instance, if you challenge them on their behaviours, they can provoke you. When you’re thinking emotionally, logic flies out the window. If they want to punish you, or want some drama, they have a go-to strategy to provoke your emotions. Narcissists like to be able to say or do something, and gain an emotional reaction. Some narcissists like provoking jealously in their partners. And this probably brought the demise of our relationship. I sensed that she WANTED me to be jealous. And sometimes accuse me of being jealous, even when I wasn’t. Make new male friends, and talk about them incessantly. Throughout my marriage I sensed she was baiting me into jealousy. Which is why you’re left with limp excuses. Just like upgrading your car won’t keep you up at night. Leaving you for someone else won’t keep them awake at night. Narcissists don’t have emotional empathy towards others. That’s more important than trivial matters as being a good companion, or a caring person. Which is adoration, attention and control. Narcissists want someone who gives them narcissistic supply. But they may make a better partner for a narcissist. The new supply may not be a better partner than you. Or perhaps more importantly, they’re more controllable. They may be younger, better looking, or of a higher status. The narcissist perceives their new flame as an upgrade. So they rarely end a relationship unless there’s another lined up. Narcissists don’t usually want to be single. The biggest reason a narcissist leaves someone is because they’ve found someone else. Please Check Out This Short Video To Aid Your Understanding… And won’t admit their narcissistic motivations.įor sanity’s sake, and to help you move on, here’s the REAL reasons why narcissists leave their partners… Narcissists will almost certainly blame you, even when it’s their fault. It’s usually not worth listening to their reasons for leaving you. Which effectively leaves you on the back-burner, just in case. Meaning they can probably snap you up in the future, should they want to. The narcissist knows that without proper closure, it’s difficult to move on.

Wondering whether they’ll change their mind, and what’s really going on. You’re left in limbo, confused and befuddled. And narcissists don’t want anyone seeing their true colours. Because the truth reveals how they REALLY think. Narcissists often give weak reasons for leaving, because they don’t want to admit the truth. This is all I get after what I’ve put up with?! This naturally leaves their partners devastated. Or blame you in some wishy washy way, such as “you don’t love me enough.” They may say something vague like, “I need to get my head together”. When narcissists end relationships, they give weak excuses at best.

Narcissist losing control